I want to speak, I want to speak
but I do not want to speak this
this is all pointless
I can see myself crumbling again
How do I describe the abjectness that seizes me?
How do I?
Sometimes I feel like I’m stuck in a cold dark place
And there’s no escape
I can feel the hole drilled from the one side of my head to the other,
as I stand
unable to do anything about it
scream in excruciating pain
As I said, I want to speak
But not this
This is all in vain.